They Got What They Deserved

A housekeeper charged with looting the homes of Manhattan's rich and famous claimed she targeted Robert De Niro's wife because she was a bad employer, according to court documents made public Tuesday."I didn't steal from Isabella Rossellini because she treated me well. I only stole from people who didn't treat me with respect," Lucyna Turyk-Wawrynowicz said, according to the court documents.

WHAT?! For publicity, Victoria Gotti MADE UP that she had breast cancer?! Oh, that is so low.

Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie took Maddox to see a dinosaur exhibit in Canada over the weekend. Brad's loving playing daddy.

I'm getting ready to move to Park Slope this weekend. Yay? Complicated, but should be fun...and the people living there now might leave their turntable....Momo, G-Love, and Ketty will become spin doctors extraordinaire - especially if Varmus is around, too.

A couple of themes for the day: 1) Celebrities like to eat junk food... Bennifer II hit up Wendy's - note Ben's Biggie cup.
(Like Marie Antoinette eating cake while Paris burned, Jen eats fries while her ex, Michael Vartan, frantically fears for his job - support her spurned ex here)

while Nicole preferred the nachos of Baja Fresh-

Is the boyfriend making Mary Kate healthier?

She stops by Whole Foods with the honey to get a little honey...(And note how she tries to pull off an Ashley look today with the classic Oxford shirt.)

Like Brit and Nic, Mischa loves the coffee-to-go cups. And looky, cowboy boots for the Keds girl!

2) Celebrities, no matter how good a run they've been having (like Jessica Simpson), still like to fug it up. What's UP with this saggy number in London, Jess?

Jealous of the attention Jessica's been getting lately, Ashlee changes her hairstyle (yet again) and sports a short skirt, hoping that'll get people talking about her again.

On the baby beat, Angelina showed of Mad and Zahara on the NYC set of "The Good Shephard..."

While Julia Roberts and hubby, Danny, loaded up their precious babes for a long flight.

Nicole Richie tries to emulate Jackie O with the '60s print and oversize sunglasses (and totes her omnipresent Starbucks cup). Meanwhile, she and DJ AM have apparently recovered from last week's tiff at club LAX.

We know that the paparazzi harass the celebs (most recently Scarlett's accident at Disneyland) and it's terrible for people like Reese Witherspoon with her kids - she shouldn't be game, but honestly, where would Nicole or Paris be without the help of the paparazzi? It's a business and some just love to feed off it...

Sightings: Things are apparently getting better between Jude and Sienna - she was recently snapped in a London wax store, having just had the procedure done (would post the pix, but can't get them up right now)...

Whose booty am I?

Charlize Theron, looking almost as good in a bikini post "Monster" as she did before gaining 30 pounds and an Oscar. Incidentally, I hear she's got an upcoming Marie Claire cover soon.

Time catches up with Kanye.

Courtney Love ordered into rehab. For any of ya'll who saw her drunkenly/stoned claiming to be sober at Pamela Anderson's Comedy Central Roast, this news should come as no surprise.

Gasp! Could it be?! Lindsay actually looks like a healthy normal American girl here (making Nicole look a little like an anorexic smurf) in this photo taken at the grand opening of the LAX club. Maybe it's just me, but I had flashbacks of "Less than Zero" with all the well-dressed, financially secure, Young Hollywood jet-setters on the scene...From Mischa Barton and Jessica Alba to Lukas Haas to Pink and Corey to Leelee and Lindsay's mop-haired friend, it looks like a hard partying night for the B-listers.

This pic of Nicole and DJ AM shows the fight that today's Rush & Molloy (half-way down the page) alleges they were having the night of the party

Pre-bash, Lindsay grabbed pizza with Bruce and Demi's lighter-looking daughter, Rumer Willis, then headed out to dinner with Nicole Richie and les amis.

But really, what fun are party pictures if you don't show Tara Reid? Apparently celebrating her new disaster of a show Taradise, Tara hit the clubs of London the other night.

Someone else recovering from too much partying: Eminem in Rehab for Sleeping Pill Addiction

I know you've been on pins and needles waiting for this interview to happen: Marc Cohn (Elizabeth Vargas hubby and songwriter of the 1990s hit "Walking in Memphis" ) describes the car-jacking that left him with a bullet in his skull.

More on the good ole suburban Coach Snoop.

Jared Leto has played that mysterious Jordan Catalano role for over 10 years, but damn, with that body, it's still working on me...me and every over-rated teen dream of the moment.

And on the other end of the spectrum, had to post this - Dean's Planet via JJB had shots of Alyssa Milano's Happy Trail.

Jimmy Fallon - A Lover & A Fighter

• So, I'm hearing that Jimmy Fallon recently got into a brawl at New York bar, Whiskey River. For some reason, he really likes those Murray Hill 'hotspots.' The last time I ventured out there - a year and a half ago - he was watching NCAA bball at the Black Bear Lodge.
  
  But why, you ask, did Jimmy allegedly engage in fisticuffs? He was hitting on a beautiful (slightly drunk) blonde, making out, all that good stuff, when he allegedly mentioned his girlfriend. Well, feisty blonde got upset that he was cheating on the girlfriend & hitting on her and slapped him, at which point, Jimmy got pissed. The drama escalated, bar management was called, and Jimmy was allegedly kicked out of the dive bar. Now, I'm all for not letting your man cheat, but c'mon, drunk blonde - it would've been a fun one night stand. And you could've officially answered the whole Fallon is he straight/is he gay question. Live and let live.
• Another "Eye Spy with my little Eye" - Joe Lieberman and wife, Hadassah, stuck at the Charlotte, NC airport due to weather on Sunday. He must've got a mad burst of "Joe-mentum" & caught another ride home, because while the other people on his scheduled 3:30pm flight to New York were forced to overnight in Charlotte, he was outta the airport by 4pm.

Finally...I knew I should've left for that celebrity magazine. sigh.

Courtney Love: So Busted

Courtney Love's reportedly in trouble with the law again. People magazine says authorities in Los Angeles say she's failed a drug test and violated her probation. The magazine says a judge issued a bench warrant for Love, ordering her to return to court August 19th for a review of her rehab report. People says the judge also threatened Love's attorney to do "something to solve Love's problem, or we're going to give her a year" in prison. Just Sunday night, Love told reporters she's been clean and sober for a year. A prosecutor says Love failed a drug test when she was hospitalized in July after fainting during a party in Hollywood.

Peter

He was the patriarch of ABC News and he will be missed.
ABC will be airing a 2 hour special on Peter Jennings on Wednesday night with memories from everyone from his sister to Lauren Bacall.

So, first up...Adam writes in to let me know that Real World Austiners, Danny and Melinda were spotted in Salem, NH, of all places, buying bedding and house stuff because apparently, they're MOVING IN TOGETHER. In Salem? Can anyone think why they'd go there?

All of my picture fonts are a little out-of-whack, hence the center of the page shots for all of these...but below Britney goes shopping for some fresh summer flowers, still trying to be a MILF all the way, showing off the leg, the bump, and the sexy summer boots.
Side note: I know it's trendy, but jesus, it's like the Uggs in summer - I know from experience that your feet get all sweaty and gross in the cowboy boots...it's 95 degrees...switch to flip-flops, Brit.

Hugh Grant proves what an Englishman he is - hitting the beach, but covering up from head to toe to maintain the yummy pasty-white skin.
Kate Hudson, I love you. But I don't understand why you went from such a hot red-carpet premiere dress to the 1980's fug disaster at The Skeleton Key afterparty. I know that 80's is all retro-cool right now, but this number should've been left in the closet.
A friend notes: Is Jessica Simpson smelling her hand to see if there's any Knoxville on there....But no,, she's just blowing kisses to the fans outside Letterman.
Separately, did ya'll catch her on Letterman last night? Sometimes I like Jessica - other times, she's just way too much of a drag queen child star, performing her routine. She's got no soul - it was seriously so painful trying to watch her dance sexy - she was jerking all over the place, like some 15 year old girl trying to show that she's got boobs. I kept wanting them to bring up one of her backup dancers to show her how to really make the audience want you.

Lee Iacocca and Snoop appear in Chrysler Group ads:
The 80-year-old Iacocca and Snoop Dogg, who made his name rapping about sex and marijuana, appear as golf buddies in the ad, scheduled to begin airing Saturday. Snoop Dogg wears an argyle sweater vest, while Iacocca dons a pastel plaid hat.

At the end of the TV spot, Snoop Dogg says: "If the ride is more fly, then you must buy." Iacocca responds: "That's what I hear."

And finally, I'm really enjoying Junk Feud this week. From the Hohan nose pix to the study of the undies, it's good stuff...

Just a few little links today. Got Thai with the semi-sugadaddy and his brother last night. Sort of awkward, because the brother has been my friend since I was 10. And I feel weird hanging out with his BROTHER! It's uncomfortable, ya know. The bro just moved to the city this week, so I popped by the new apt with Heineken last night to do the whole 'welcome-to-the-city, let's unpack' thing- The fact that I'm hanging out with his brother never came up although for me there was an awkward, okay, good night moment right before we went to bed. No huge slumber party -yet. I'd been ready to turn into a pumpkin as soon as the bro got here and call the whole thing off with SD. We'll see...

Anyway - it's official if the NY Times says so...Mariah's got the song of summer. I wanna make a list of my top 10 summer songs ever - was thinking about that on the way to the subway this morning b/c Ben Harper came on my Ipod. Not really a song of summer, but made me think of the summer of '97 when he was all I ever listened to.

Umm...Gisele likes to clean - not sure why this made the papers, but there it is..
For at least another couple of years til the movie career doesn't quite work out, Jennifer Aniston is determined to forget that "Friends" ever existed in her life.
Melissa Etheridge is thinking about having a baby with her partner, Tammy Lynn Michaels.
Martha Stewart will spend 3 extra weeks under house arrest for repeatedly violating conditions of her parole - staying out late, going to yoga, and motoring around the property on a tractor. Crazy Martha.
And I'm gonna post this because someone sent it to me - thanks! - although it breaks my heart. Eddie Murphy bro and Chappelle Show cast member Charlie Murphy says the show's officially over.

Lotsa Laguna Beach Gossip: shocker...the show's not REAL?!

So, this little Laguna Beach gem is making the email rounds...if ya'll have seen it, apologies - I've been mostly away from the Internet for awhile - but not email...so I'm glad this it made its way to me.

"A buddy of Nick's is studying with Trey from Laguna and we were chillin with him the whole day yesterday.

1) Stephen's parents have practically disowned him after the show. They were not that cool to begin with and the dad couldn't deal with all the attention from his friends from work. If you notice they don't even pick up Stephen from the airport when he goes back for Christmas break, he takes a taxi.

2) Lo is the biggest slut on the show. Seriously, the reason no one really goes after her is because she took it from everybody her first few years. On the show she acts like a good girl because she is very afraid of her folks and that's the deal she cut with MTV. But apparently she is the dirtiest, and does mad coke now from what Tre says (I told you there was something there!).

3) That dude Matt that Kristen is "dating" is Matt Leinart, USC quarterback. He called her up after the first season and invited her up to watch a game of his. Apparently he digs her, but that is just the word from Laguna, I'm sure his SC buddies would tell it differently

4) Maxim is offering all the Laguna girls half a million each to pose for their magazine. That would be awesome by the way

5) Tre used to date Kristen and in fact that's how she got to know Stephen! Tre dated her up until the beginning of his junior year I guess. He said you never really see them interact in the first season and when you do it is awkward. Tre didn't let to get to him b/c he's a cool dude (which he is actually) and didn't want to let a girl get in the way of his friendship.

I think that's the good stuff. Anyway, these guys are like celebrities now, especially with 16 yr old girls which he said is the hardest thing. The reason why Kristen is such a bitch to Stephen now is he got so much play in SF, basically everywhere he went as he commanded it. Even like chicks in their thirties apparently. Strangely enough though the dude still likes Kristen, apparently he can't really get over her."

At Least Wait Til You're 20

So now Jamie Lynn, I know you've probably got younger sister syndrome, thinking that big sis, Brit Brit is the coolest and that you wanna be her in every way, but slow down, little one. I don't wanna believe what Us Weekly reported this week - that 14-year-old you was spotted smoking - around pregnant Britney, no less! So if the fear of giving pregnant Brit a baby with lung problems wasn't enough to halt your bad habits (isn't it enough that it's obviously already going to be a little mentally challenged), maybe this will: Cigarette Smoke Could Pack on Pounds for Teens.

Ask Kelly Osbourne - no one likes their starlets fat.

• Angelina gives Brad the ultimatum: It's cigarettes or SEX. Meanwhile, Jen Aniston opens up to Vanity Fair, crying at points, to reveal how sad she feels about the affair. Aniston tells September's Vanity Fair, on stands Friday:

"Am I lonely? Yes. Am I upset? Yes. Am I confused? Yes. Do I have my days when I've thrown a little pity party for myself? Absolutely. But I'm also doing really wellBut the idea that Aniston, 36, was stalling on starting a family with Pitt, 41, gets the actress fuming. "I've never in my life said I didn't want to have children. I did, and I do, and I will!"

She's forgiving of Pitt, even though they no longer talk, and she says she believes him when he says he did not sleep with Jolie before the marriage broke up in January.

Best friend Courteney Cox chimes in to reveal that while there was no affair, "there was a connection" between Jolie and Pitt, "and he was honest about that with Jen."

• I can't decide if this is good or bad: Scarlett Johansson claims Ewen McGregor smooches like a schoolboy.
• Paris vs. Nicole: Well, Razzie judges - it sounds like November 4 will be a big day for the shitty actress showdown.
• No surprise to anyone: Jess-n-Nick: Already divorced?

RELATED: Shocker...first Alicia Keys, now Jessica Simpson might've used Accutane instead of ProActiv?! You mean celebrities don't always use the products they endorse? But TrimSpa really worked on Anna Nicole, right? I mean, I gotta believe in something...

• Sienna Miller wins back the Edie Sedgwick role b/c Jude Law's affair made her a bigger name. Whatever the reason, I'm still just glad it didn't go to Katie Holmes. Also, despite her flirtation with Kate Bosworth's man, Orlando Bloom, it sounds like she and Jude had their own version of a G-8 summit last weekend.
• Speaking of Katie Holmes - she's got no issues with grossing us all out with PDA-ing the neutered Tom Cruise, but ask her to pose in a nudie bodysuit and then she's horrified.
• Kate Moss offers to pay for an anti-heroin implant for the boyf, Pete Doherty. Who says romance isn't alive these days?
• More of Bobby -n -Whitney's bathroom drama. Oh, Whit, how the mighty do fall.
  Al Gore's new network for people like me, Current TV, starts today - I'm actually gonna try to check it out tonight. In the meantime, can at least read the blog at work.
  
  Had a ridiculous weekend. I feel like such a waste today. Then headed out to Park Slope where we (think) we found a new apartment. Just down the street from Varmus - yay. Right around the corner from the 2/3, cool neighborhood, and yay, going to save at least $100/month!