Now's as good a time as any...

So, I'm stuck in my bed for the immediate future, having been here since Tuesday. Leg surgery, or cross that, vein surgery - I'm really not an 80 year old grandma, I swear, I just have bad veins that had to be taken out.

At first I was planning to go all Lindsay Lohan on everyone. Forget Anna Nicole's Trim Spa. I figured I could stand to do Lohan's whole cracked-out hospitalization thing and was getting sort of psyched thinking about my post-surgery diet of painkillers, crackers, and agua. I mean, Lohan did it and got the cover of Entertainment Weekly. But I forgot to add my mother's good intentions into my diet plan.

While I'm in bed, my mother is keeping busy, ecstatic over the fact that I'm home for the first time in months & she's able to be a caregiver. So - I lie here, the victim of my mother's maternal instincts, as she spoon feeds me soup, Christmas cookies, fudge, brownies, roast (hell yeah), pimento cheese, green beans, ice cream, I don't know, it's all blurring together. I can't run. So, now I'm a little concerned that my booty has doubled in size and I won't be able to fit into my New Year's dress when I get back to NYC....the horrors!

Oh, but the point of this little monologue - I'm going to get into blogging. I'm going to become a serious blogster in the vein (no pun intended -he he) of whatevs, lindsayism, myblogispoop, ultragrrl, fugging it up,...I mean, a girl, especially one who has lost her veins and is sitting in bed at her mother's mercy, can dream, right? Let me have that...